The International Lapooska
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Post by The International Lapooska on Oct 14, 2017 18:43:41 GMT -5
In the wake of the recent scandal revolving around would appear to be a sort of sex-graft system, employed by a certain film mogul who is now surrounded by the tattered remnants of his own reputation, the Film Academy has announced new measures will be instituted in their ranks which should resolve and alleviate the problem. "This crass method of trying to obtain sex, from actresses seeking roles- it's like an illegal "Stop! Pay Toll!" booth which is roiling a lot of people! It's not money they want, but... Well, you know, kitty cat." explained a spokesperson... "We've worked out a new questionnaire, including inquiries such as. Answer these True or False- "I want this part so much that I'd put out sex for it!"; "I would greatly resent any sexual advances mades towards my person by anyone in a hiring process"; "Generally speaking, I'm not promiscuous at all." etc.... This questionnaire will be administered right up front, before any interview begins! "Also, we've issued a new Modes Of Ethics guidelines sheet, in which we suggest some things that the sex-solicitous hiring agent could try,instead of forbidden modes which we cannot tolerate- for example, when the aspiring actress and such an agent first meet, during the initial handshake he could extend his middle finger up pressing against her wrist, perhaps wriggle his eyebrows a little bit; subtle body-language techniques- but we cannot recommend anything less subtle." he concluded.
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